Vilification Tennis

Google all over your Facebook

Your mom — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 00:41:03 +0000

Google all over your Facebook: The Vilification Tennis Social Network Show

Come see what kind of insults we can write in 140 characters or less! Add us as your friends! Post pictures of us on Tumblr! OMG are you going to be ROFL!!!!

Friday February 24th
at 10:00 pm (9:30 doors)
$12 in advance / $15 at the door
($12 w/ Fringe button)

Bryant Lake Bowl
810 West Lake Street
Minneapolis MN 55408
BLB Box Office: 612-825-8949

Vilification Tennis JEWbilee

Your mom — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 05:33:56 +0000

Vilification Tennis JEWbilee!

Be honest, you don’t know how to spell Hanukah correctly, you’ve never read Merchant of Venice and you call that hat Jews wear on their heads “that hat that Jews wear on their heads.” This show is for you! We will do our best to be as offensive and insensitive as always but for January, we’ll feature more bacon. Because WE can eat it.

Friday January 27th
at 10:00 pm (9:30 doors)
$12 in advance / $15 at the door
($12 w/ Fringe button)

Bryant Lake Bowl
810 West Lake Street
Minneapolis MN 55408
BLB Box Office: 612-825-8949

Accountant Masturbates To Wall Street Journal

Salsa — Tue, 03 Jan 2012 07:05:50 +0000

Michael Douglas, an accountant for the New York trading firm Goldberg, Smith, and Smith, has finally admitted to what the whole 43rd floor has known or suspected for years.

“It’s true,” Douglas confessed to a friend during a late night drinking session. “Those numbers are just so… so… you know what I mean. They just… flow across the page. I mean, I know some of those figures are artificially inflated due to market bubbles, but every time I see the S&P 500 rates, I just get aroused.”

This announcement comes as no surprise to Douglas’ co-workers. “More than once I have opened his office door to find him quickly slip something into his desk, but not before I saw a glimpse of this week’s silver prices,” said analyst Brian Templeton. “I mean, what guy doesn’t get a little excited about the Commodities Market, but, c’mon, you’re at work!”

Douglas remains unapologetic, though. “This does not mean that I love my own company’s consumer pricing any less,” he declared. “Things are really great for us between the spreadsheets. But, a man has needs, y’know. Just because I sometimes like to fantasize about owning shares in other people’s mutual funds doesn’t mean I’m a bad man.”

The Wall Street Journal could not be reached for comment.

NHL Launches Campaign to Raise Awareness of NHL

Salsa — Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:05:48 +0000

Citing the ever-decreasing number of hockey fans in the country, NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman has announced a campaign to raise public awareness that the NHL does, in fact, exist.

At a press conference held at the NHL Headquarters in New York, Bettman officially launched the “What Would Gretzky Do”, or WWGD Campaign. “We at the NHL hope that by raising public awareness of hockey, eventually we can reach the point where people actually watch a game,” stated Bettman.

The announcement kicked off a multi-million dollar campaign which includes TV commercials featuring prominent hockey figures, WWGD bracelets which are shaped like a string of missing teeth, and billboards telling people who Wayne Gretzky is.

The Vilification Tennis Fringe Show: A one man musical interpretive dance about growing up as a gay single mom in the Midwest

Your mom — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 02:56:10 +0000

The Vilification Tennis Fringe Show: A one man musical interpretive dance about growing up as a gay single mom in the Midwest

With the Minnesota Fringe Festival just around the corner, it is time for us to make fun of everything that makes the fringe a favorite for all sorts of people who aren’t us. Join us as we present a one man musical interpretive dance about growing up a gay single mom in the midwest. We are hoping to have many well known fringers join us to make this a truly memorable show about a whole lot of truly forgettable theatre. We imagine most of them will turn us down. Pretentious jerks.

Friday July 22nd and
Saturday July 23rd
at 10:00 pm (9:30 doors)
$12 in advance / $15 at the door
($12 w/ Fringe button)

Bryant Lake Bowl
810 West Lake Street
Minneapolis MN 55408
BLB Box Office: 612-825-8949

The Biggest Loser

Your mom — Mon, 13 Jun 2011 02:28:35 +0000

Vilification Tennis: The Biggest Loser

The return of our annual amateur show will pit aspiring vilifers against one another in a series of humiliating games that we call an “audition.” It could be a train wreck, it could be really funny. There is a good chance it will be both. The audience will be final judge of which amateur makes it to the final round and is crowned The Biggest Loser!

Saturday June 25th
at 10:00 pm (9:30 doors)
$12 in advance / $15 at the door
($12 w/ Fringe button)

Bryant Lake Bowl
810 West Lake Street
Minneapolis MN 55408
BLB Box Office: 612-825-8949

Knightbert

Patrick — Tue, 24 May 2011 06:00:23 +0000

Beyond ThunderCageDome DeathMatch

Your mom — Sun, 15 May 2011 17:17:24 +0000

Beyond ThunderCageDome DeathMatch:
Vilification Tennis Salutes Professional Wrestling

Our show is all about talking smack and so is professional wrestling. What better combination could there be, Gene??? Just what would a pile driver look like in Vilification Tennis? You’ll have to come to the show to find out! Pizpor the Magician is scheduled to be a part of this cage match so come on down and join the Vilification Brawl!

Friday May 27th
at 10:00 pm (9:30 doors)
$12 in advance / $15 at the door
($12 w/ Fringe button)

Bryant Lake Bowl
810 West Lake Street
Minneapolis MN 55408
BLB Box Office: 612-825-8949

Vilnuts

Patrick — Tue, 10 May 2011 06:00:56 +0000

My God can Beat up Your God

Your mom — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 05:47:16 +0000

My God can Beat up Your God: The Most Sacrilegious Vilification Tennis Ever!

That’s right, it is time for Vilification Tennis to talk about religion. Think your religion can withstand the withering spotlight of Vilification Tennis? Come and see! Free graven images for all audience members!

Friday April 29th and
Saturday April 30th
at 10:00 pm (9:30 doors)
$12 in advance / $15 at the door
($12 w/ Fringe button)

Bryant Lake Bowl
810 West Lake Street
Minneapolis MN 55408
BLB Box Office: 612-825-8949